I know we are all about hot romance and love here at Blaze. And goodness knows I’m all for that! But when it comes to Valentine’s Day, well, I think we should get rid of it. There I said it. I, Ms. Romantic USA wishes the whole commercialized goop would go down the drain.

Couples put so much pressure on that one day. It’s insane what we expect out of one of another. I personally think we should have a LOVE DAY once a month. I’m talking about a day when we all appreciate one another and do kind things. Yes, I know I sound like some kind of whacked pollyanna. But think about it. If we made loving and caring for one another a habit at least one day a month, it might accidentally spread to more days.

My husband does this in little ways. Sometimes he brings flowers home for no reason. Or he cleans the kitchen without being asked. I have to say the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen him do is laundry. There’s something about a man cleaning house that just gets me going. To me love is really about those moments when he gets it. He gets that I’m tired, worn out and brain dead, and he wants to help make me feel better. I make his favorite dinners for the same reason and help set up his appointments because he has to sleep most days and works nights. It’s these little things we do for each other all the time that are romantic to me.

One of the sweetest things that ever happened cost us less than $5. We didn’t have a lot of extra money and we’d sworn that we wouldn’t buy gifts that year. My husband had been off work for several weeks for appendicitis and times were tough. After we put the kids to bed, I made dinner at home. He set the table in the dining room and when I brought the food in there was a small gift bag by my plate. I rolled my eyes. And then went back to the kitchen where I’d hidden a gift for him.

When he saw the bag he started laughing. We each opened the bags and we laughed so loud we woke up the kids. He’d given me a can of whip cream and I’d given him a jar of maraschino cherries. An inside joke from one of our first dates in college. Neither of us knew what the other was doing, which is what made it the perfect moment.

Don’t get me wrong. My husband is good with the gifts. He bought me an iPad for Christmas, which I adore. I have him an iTouch which he looks at like it’s an alien. (The man is not into technology. Anything more complicated than a remote has no purpose in his life. LOL.) But when I showed him how all his old people music could go with him wherever he goes, he perked up a little. Any way, he’s generous in that way.

But for us, Valentines is just an excuse to eat a good dinner, which we pretty much do every weekend. And at some point this weekend flowers, probably yellow roses, will show up in the vase. (I’m his yellow rose of Texas. I know, I know. But we all have our cornball moments.) But those things won’t happen because it’s Valentine’s Day.

In fact, on Valentine’s Day I’ll probably be alone. (He has to travel.) He’ll make sure the dogs have their special biscuits since we want them to know how much we love them. I’ll put a little extra in my kids’ accounts so they can take their girls out, but for the most part it will be just another day. Like all the days when you’re with someone you love.

So tell me how you feel about Valentine’s Day. It’s okay if you love it. Has your significant other ever surprised you with an amazing or funny gift? What’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever done for a loved one?

Tell me, I really want to know.

Happy Love Day to you all!

I don’t know about you, but I need more laughter in my life. This hasn’t usually been a problem for me, but 2010 was a year of so many ups and downs, that this year I made having more fun one of my goals. I posted that for all the world to see last month on this blog. But more than anything I want to laugh hard at least once a day. My doctor says it’s good for you.

As I write this I’m out in LA/Pasadena at the TV Critics Press Tour. That’s where we view all the new shows and talk to the actors/writers/producers about their creation. Over a two-week period we cover cable and broadcast networks and it’s a pretty crazy time. But what I like about this year is that there are some comedies coming up that made me laugh out loud.

The one that made me laugh the hardest was “Mr. Sunshine” with Matthew Perry and Allison Janney. There’s a scene in the pilot that made me laugh so hard I couldn’t breath. I thought maybe it was just me, but both of my sons laughed just as hard. I hope the show continues to be funny and if you want to check it out, it debuts Wednesday, Feb. 9, at 9:30 ET.

Another new comedy that made me laugh is “Traffic Lights” (Fox, Tuesday, Feb. 8, 9 p.m.) This kind of show isn’t one I normally would pay attention to, but there’s something quite delightful about the combination of actors/writers and story telling in this one. I’ve seen a couple of episodes and I’ve laughed a lot. I think the title is probably the worst one ever for a comedy, but it makes me laugh so it’s a forgivable mistake.

The movie that made me laugh the hardest last year, and yes I’m a little embarrassed to say this, “Get Him to the Greek.” The combination of Russell Brand and Jonah Hill was one of the best comedy pairings I’ve seen in a long time. If you don’t mind rude, crude humor, this movie will make you pass out from laughter. I’m thinking about putting it on my iPhone so I can watching wherever I am in the world.

The book that made me laugh the hardest in 2010 was “Red-Headed Stepchild” by my friend Jaye Wells. That girl can tell a story and she doesn’t with wicked brand of humor and paranormal fun.

My favorite website for laugh-out-loud fun is http://damnyouautocorrect.com/ Now be warned, many of the text can be crude. But when I need a quick pick me up this is where I go.

Share with me some of the things that make you laugh whether it’s books, TV, Movies or websites. Let’s all have a good laugh to start the New Year off right!

Do you make resolutions for the New Year? I interview celebs for the day job and I’ve been asking all of them this question for the past two months. Their answer was always, NO. Some, like Nancy O’Dell make affirmations for the new year. Hers is to stay positive. When I asked Scott Underwood from the band Train about resolutions, he says for him it’s just about surviving in the winter time. He makes his resolutions in the spring, which he says is when he feels inspired.

I’ll admit that I don’t make resolutions, but I do make goals. It’s important for me to see what I’ve accomplished and to have a goal or two or ten to reach for in the long term. I also make goals for different parts of my life.

But I realized I’ve never made goals to have fun. And that’s something I’ve been missing. In the past I’ve often shared my work goals, but seldom my personal ones. This year I’m shaking things up. I’m putting it all out there into the universe for all to see. And I’d love it if you would share some of yours.

Candy’s Goals

Books/Writing
1. To remember this is therapy for me and that it isn’t just about getting the words on the page. It’s about telling a good story.
2. To give myself enough time to really make the story what I want it to be.
3. To write at least three books this year.
4. To sell my YA
5. To finish my Devil’s Girl book
6. To promote the heck out of She Who Dares, Wins and Truth and Dare
7. To finish The Model Marine.

School
1. Keep my 4.0.
2. Make time for studying, at least 15 hours a week.
3. Remember why I love it so much.

Work
1. Try to work ahead as much as possible.
2. Remember that I have some pretty cool day jobs as a TV and Film critic, and to appreciate the benefits that affords me.
3. To shake off the small day to day stuff.
4. To always let my interviewee tell a good story.

Personal
1. I want to eat good food. The kind that nourishes my body and makes me feel good. I’ve given up on diets, but I want to eat foods that help me out in the long run.
2. Cut out sugar. It’s like crack for me, and I have to look at it as a gateway drug for bad eating. I feel so much better when I don’t eat it. (I’ve written this after I had two chocolate chip cookies before breakfast. Sigh.)
3. To organize my office and buy furniture so that I can keep it that way.
4. To be a kinder and more understanding person.
5. To remember how cool my life is and to be grateful for it.

Fun Goals!
1. To spend more time with my best buds.
2. To travel somewhere that I need a passport.
3. To get a passport.
4. To go to RWA in NYC this summer.
5. To do a book tour in April and May traveling to see many of my lovely friends.
6. To learn French. (I suck at languages but I’ve ALWAYS wanted to learn French.)
7. To make 1 hour a day just fun or meditation time.
8. To sleep more.
9. To spend more time doing fun things with my kids and The Hub.
10. To laugh out loud really hard at least once a day.

So I’ve showed you mine, now you show me yours.

Happy New Year!

I don’t know about you, but I had one of those years where some really great things happened and some not-so great things happened. For some reason Thanksgiving is a time when I sit down and reflect on the year. I make a list of what I’ve accomplished and some of the areas where maybe I need to work a little harder.

Most people do this kind of reflection around the New Year and make resolutions. But I have a different way of looking at it. This is a time of year when we need to remember that it’s important to be thankful during the good times and the bad times.

The instant I begin to feel sorry for myself, and I mean within minutes, I’ll see an article or a friend will call, and their problems will be way worse than mine. I’m grateful that I have the life I do.

Why I’m thankful:
1. I may be working three jobs, but they are all jobs I love.
2. My kids might drive me crazy, but I wouldn’t trade them for anything in the world. And I love that they are good men.
3. My husband might also drive me crazy, but he’s a good man and very supportive of my career. (Though, he keeps saying, “When can I quit my job and fish all day while you work?” LOL. I tell him I’m working on that.)
4. I may not sleep much, but I’m grateful that my brain goes 220 miles a minute and is always filled with ideas.
5. I have parents who also drive me crazy sometimes, but they are my biggest fans and have always told me I could accomplish anything I put my mind to. My entire extended family is this way. I wish everyone could have a family like mine.
6. I get to live in different worlds with my writing. I’m thankful for my ability to lose myself in these world and write the stories that I do.
7. This should have been higher on the list but I’m too lazy to go back and re-type all the numbers: I have the most amazing friends. These are people who are 100 percent there for me – always.
8. I work with great people at my publishing houses. Sure my editors can make me cry with revisions, but they always make the books better.
9. I’m grateful that I had the courage to go to Grad School. It’s so freakin’ hard sometimes, but it’s opened my world in ways I can’t even begin to tell you.
10. I’m just grateful to be alive. I don’t take very good care of myself, but that’s about to change. No, for real this time. It isn’t about being slim, it’s about feeling good. And I really want that for myself.

So share the things that you are thankful for and don’t be shy!

Happy Holiday’s Ya’ll

When I was a kid Halloween was one of my favorite times of year. My Mom, Dad, Grandpa or Grandma would take me around the neighborhood as I gathered goodies that would send me to the dentist months later. My family didn’t have a great deal of disposable income, but I always seemed to have a fun costume. I wasn’t super crazy about masks (I still don’t like them). The eye holes were never quite right and you always sound like Darth Vadar when you wear one. The costumes I remember most are the ones that were made up mainly by my Dad and Grandpa Doc.

One year when it was raining no one was out trick or treating. My Dad suggested I put on my blue raincoat, rain boots and hat. Then he gave me an umbrella and I was the Morton Salt girl. The neighbors loved it and thought it was hilarious that I would make my dad traipse around in the rain. (I might have whined a little, but the costume was his idea.) I couldn’t have been more than six and it was one of the best nights ever, because I had whole bags of candy neighbors gave me because no one else was dumb enough to go out in the rain.

Then there was the year my mom was in the hospital for a rather serious operation. Dad and Grandma Irby were with her, which left Grandpa Doc in charge of the Halloween festivities. Life had been a little crazy just then and no one had thought I might need a costume. I was crushed at the time, but now realize what was going on with my mom and why Halloween wasn’t on anyone’s list of priorities. My Grandpa couldn’t stand me being unhappy for a second. (We didn’t have a lot of funds, but we did have a ton of love in our family.) He found a brand new mop head, put my grandma’s silk bed jacket on me with a woolen skirt and my black Mary Janes. He called me a fancy Raggedy Ann, and I was five so I believed him. I had some strange looks that night but the neighbors I think felt a little sorry for me and gave me tons of extra candy.

I called it a win.

Flash forward several years and it was time for me to come up with costumes for my own kids. Being spoiled as they are, and I can’t sew, so most of the costumes were bought. I loved it when they were little and I could dress them up as ducks or dragons. But it wasn’t long before Batman and Power Rangers came into action and the days of the super cute costumes were gone. Only once have we done a homemade costume for them. When the oldest was ten and his brother was seven, they decided they were too old to trick-or-treat, that is until all their friends came to the door and wanted them to go with them.

We had no costumes so we cut holes in twin sheets and they went as ghosts. It wasn’t very original, but it was funny. After that year we always bought scary rubber masks just in case. They’ve had some really ugly ones through the years.

As an adult, I occasionally have the need for a costume and I usually keep it pretty simple. Sometimes I’m a witch or I go to some old standbys. There’s the blackened eye, with a letter P on a sweatshirt. Black-eyed P. Or the small cereal box taped to a shirt with a plastic knife or axe going through it. Cereal Killer. (Both of those were devised by my very creative friend Debbie Lindsey.)

I still enjoy handing out candy to the little kids and seeing all the costumes. In fact, we usually have a party that night but I won’t go until later so I disappoint any of the neighborhood kids. I know the feeling of someone dumping a handful of candy in your pumpkin basket. Though, my kids used pillowcases so they could get more loot.

So I want to hear about your favorite Halloween costumes. What were some of your favorites? Do you have a favorite candy? (Mine are Reeses.) What’s the most fun you’ve ever had on Halloween?

Tell me, I really want to know.

My Stonegate series is filled with spies, detectives and mystery, along with a whole lot of romance. In order to do some down and dirty research for these stories, I’ve volunteered to go on a series of Super Secret Spy Missions. I travel a lot, but it’s almost always to New York and Los Angeles for day job related stuff.

This is different. I’m hitting out of the way points of interest and doing super secret spy stuff, along with my research at the same time. Each trip has a mission, which I unfortunately can’t share, but I also manage some fun along the way. I mean, where does it say in the spy handbook that spy girl can’t go shopping? As long as I get the “job” done, the rest of the time is mine.

Below the first few pictures are from the last mission. Piece the clues together and see if you can come up with what you think the mission was about.

I’m so lucky for this next mission. GM is actually providing me a Chevy Traverse, because part of this trip means hauling stuff. (I have to tell you I’m loving this car. Cool gadgets and super secret compartments galore. Perfect for a spy.) I’ll be posting pictures on my own blog at www.candacehavens.com. Make sure you keep up with what I’m doing, because you might just have a chance to do some spying of your own very soon.

And tell me about your favorite getaway. Where do you go to hide from the world? Where is the one place you are most relaxed? Have you ever had to keep a secret so big you thought you might burst? Tell me, I really want to know.
-Candy
www.candacehavens.com

Sherwood Forest Plantation

A Mystic Garden

The Infamous Whoopie Pie

The beginning of Mission #2

This is one awesome spy mobile.

Chevy Traverse Spy Mobile

I’ve spent the last few weeks covering the new American TV season for the day job. I spend about 18 hours a day while I’m in Los Angeles talking to the actors, writers and producers of all the new shows on network and cable channels. (I know, tough job but someone has to do it.) I thought it might be fun to tell you about some of the hot new guys hitting the networks this fall. Now, these aren’t my favorite shows, just pretty boys to share with you.

Lonestar (Fox): These pictures don’t do James Wolk justice. He’s honestly a cross between Cary Grant and George Clooney. His character on the show is charming, but not nearly as much as Wolk. I could eat him up.

Hawaii Five-O (CBS): Okay, so you know most of these guys from other shows, but now they are all together. Woot. From l-r Scott Caan, Daniel Dae Kim and Alex O’Loughlin, and the lovely woman in the bikini is Grace Park. (By the way, the show is way cooler than you would think.)

Blue Bloods (CBS): That Tom Selleck looks pretty awesome in a uniform. Will Estes and Donnie Walhberg also star, which means a little something for all of us.

Undercovers (NBC): It’s hard to find a man prettier than Boris Kodjoe, even with a little blood on him.

Outlaw (NBC): Dude it’s Jimmy Smits.

Outsourced (NBC): I have to admit I’m totally charmed by Ben Rappaport.

I’m a TV and movie critic for the day job, but I’d never seen an episode of “The Hills” on MTV until recently. A few weeks ago one of the publicists from the network asked if I might be interested in talking to someone from the show since this is its last season. I declined at the time, but I ended up watching season one that night through Netflix on my Wii.

I was shocked. These people were so manipulative, at times pathetic, and I was totally sucked in. During my free time, which is about an hour a day right now, I find myself watching more episodes and it might be an addiction. I don’t even like these people, yet I can’t stop watching. I’m about half way through season three. Sigh.

It is great for character study if you want to find out how to create tension and drama for people in their 20s. And villains are so numerous it’s hard to find the good guys. Seriously, is there a more hated figure than Spencer Pratt, on any television show? The guy has absolutely no redeeming qualities and makes for a great villain.

At first I thought I Heidi was the typical blond bimbo victim, but she’s just as evil as Spencer. These two never worry about who they step on, as long as they get what they want. And there is absolutely nothing romantic about their relationship.

In fact as soapy as it is, there is a serious lack of real romance on “The Hills.” The relationships are shallow. From what I can tell so far, there’s no room for loving anyone else, because they are all so in love with themselves. There’s a lot of hooking up but when it comes the romance, well, it’s all so hallow.

The guys make grand gestures, but there’s no heart or passion behind them. I worry that their behavior might be examples for America’s youth. It makes me want to run ads during the broadcast that young women, especially, should pick up a romance novel. We write about tough chicks who don’t take crap from men, and at the same time can have deep connections with their significant others. If some guy is manipulating you, it’s time to walk away. And even if you are young you can find true intimacy, and I’m not talking about sex.

One could argue that this is what people in their 20s do, but I don’t.

It is possible, in real life, to have romance? You have to work at it. I know these are very young people, it’s a TV show and it isn’t real, but a little romance wouldn’t hurt. I watch my boys, who are 19 and 22, and how they treat the young women they date. They aren’t anything like the boys on “The Hills.” They are respectful, kind, faithful and romantic. Okay, sometimes the romantic part makes me gag because they are my children. But they’re so sweet. The guys they hang out with are also good to the young women they date.

The youngest made Oreo truffles and a special CD last week when his girlfriend returned from Africa after five weeks of mission work. For the girlfriend before the last, my oldest had a cake designed that looked exactly like her favorite purse. I mean, these are thoughtful gestures. Both of my boys love with their whole heart, and though it’s difficult when things don’t work out, I admire them for it.

I think that romantic nature comes from their dad. He’s not big on PDA, but he makes up for it in other ways. I met him my freshman year in college and that summer he traveled the world with his family. He wrote me letters and poems every single day he was away. They were sweet heartfelt letters, and my kids can’t believe their dad wrote that stuff.

His proposal of marriage wasn’t quite so magical, but that’s a story for another day.

I want to know what is the most romantic thing anyone has done for you? Sometimes it’s the smallest thing, and sometimes it’s those grand gestures. Tell me, I really want to know.

Do you ever find yourself eaves dropping on conversations while out in public? Or making up entire scenarios for people you see at a mall or restaurant? Writer’s do this a great deal,and I think it’s the secret spy in all of us. Writer’s can’t help but create characters for almost everyone we meet, and listening to other people’s conversations, well, that’s just part of the job.

I make up stories all the time for people. Sometimes I turn them into covert agents and other times what they say is enough to send my mind whirling. Last fall I was traveling through Oklahoma and stopped at gas station to grab snacks and fill up the tank. I was coming out of the store when I heard a woman say, “I can’t do nothin’ on Wednesday, I got to go to court every Wednesday.” It took everything bit of restraint I had not to stop and ask her what she did that she had to go to court. Two hours later as I made my way into Oklahoma City, I had an entire scenario for her in my head. Actually I had several ideas, including one where I was a spy and I infiltrated to truck stop to find out who was carrying illegal cargo. Snort. I kid you not.

But I digress… I’m rather fond of those covert operatives. That’s one of the reasons I have so many in my books. The Stonegate series for Blaze is filled with spies. They are mysterious and clever, and I don’t think I’ll ever get enough of them. I like books, television and movies about spies. The Bourne films are some of my favorites. And hello, Tom Cruise in those Mission Impossible films, well that’s just fun.

Spies are also trending in the entertainment world. We have the adorable Ashton Kutcher starring with Katherine Heigl in “Killers.” Then Mr. Cruise is back in a new spy film “Knight and Day” with Cameron Diaz. (He’s also doing Mission Impossible IV for 2011.)

In television we have a couple of new spy series coming up. One of my favorites so far is “Nikita” coming up on the CW this fall. I was a big fan of the original French film “Nikita” with Anne Parillaud, the American film “Point of No Return” and the first TV series “Le Femme Nikita.” The new version stars Maggie Q as Nikita, but there’s a big twist in this one that I won’t ruin for you. I like that Nikita has a heart, but she’s also one lethal assassin.

Another interesting spy TV show coming up is “Undercovers” on NBC. This one is about a couple played by Boris Kodjoe and Gugu Mbatha-Raw who come out of retirement to rejoin the CIA as spies. It was created by J. J. Abrams, who did one of my all-time favorite spy series “Alias.”

There are some other series like, CBS’ “The Event,” which also has spies, but they aren’t the focus of the show.

So obviously I’m not the only one who is obsessed with spies. Have you ever dreamed of being a spy? Do you have a favorite spy TV show or film? Tell me I want to know.

The little things have been piling up. You know what I’m talking about. Those things around the house and in life that cause a small bit of annoyance, yet never seem to get taken care of by the magical fairies. We’ll I’ve fired my magical fairies. Quite honestly, they never showed up for work, so don’t feel bad for them.

Now, let me preface the following by telling you this has been a wonderful, but extremely busy year so far. Last fall I added graduate school to my already slammed schedule, which made my 10 hour days seven days a week, turn into 14-hour days, and even 19-hours the last few weeks. Honestly, if I didn’t love school so much, I would never go back. I do, so I will, but I know not to load myself up quite so much in the future.

Speaking of the future, I need to get back on topic. While I was so busy, those annoying things began to pile up. The laundry, my desk, the conference table in my office, the 5000 emails (these aren’t junk mails unfortunately) on one of my accounts, the stacks of TBR books in bags all over the office, even though I read almost exclusively on my Kindle now and the tax records that are spread out all over my office. You get the picture. I’d ask other people in my house to help out with some of “the little things” but those people are men, and evidently only capable of a certain amount of responsibility.

I’ll give you an example. About a year ago our built-in microwave (We have the worst luck with microwaves) just stopped working one day. It was exactly five days past the warranty. My husband and I were both traveling that week, so I suggested he hook up the small one in a box in the garage that one of my son’s won a while back. It was barely big enough to boil a cup of water. Of course when I got back home, I found one online and showed it to my husband. He being one who has no trust of buying anything online, said he would go and check it out at the store, and let me know. Five months later I was in L.A. doing my day job stuff, and I get a call telling me the small microwave blew up. Sigh. So I call the Hub and I threaten him. “Get a new microwave before I get home, or else.” I’ll leave the “or else” to your imagination. Of course, even though I was gone for two weeks, he waited until the day I was coming home to go look. The one he wanted had to be ordered so there was no microwave when I came home. He discovered I was quite serious about the “or else.”

The little things just don’t bother my husband and my kids. As long as they have a access to food, a bed and cable, they’re pretty much happy. So if I’m bothered by the “little things” I have to take care of them myself.

I turned in a new Blaze, She Who Dares, Wins, on Wednesday.That also happened to be the last day of school (No that wasn’t a stressful week at all.) As soon as I hit send for the book, I began tackling things on my list. The first was to clean the kitchen to my standards. My husband and kids think cleaning the counters means wiping them down, but they never put anything away. They just sort of shove it to wall. The second thing on my list was to clean up those emails. The third was to read some manuscripts of people who won a critique from me in a contest. Each day since the end of school and turning in the book, I’ve tackled at least one of the things on my list.

I feel better about life right now. Every time I complete one of those things on the list, I have such a feeling of accomplishment. My day begins a little brighter, when I come downstairs and bits of my life have been cleaned up.

This weekend I’m tackling two of those things that aren’t so little, my conference table, and the piles of DVD’s I get from network and cable shows. I know when I’m done I’ll feel so much better. In fact, it feels so good, I want to do more and more.

So how about you, do you have a list of little things? Share them here and then we can all cheer each other on.