Just wanted to let everyone know the MRI results showed Cassie’s brain is normal! The findings were, “There is no mass or abnormal enhancement involving the internal auditory canals. The Mastoids are clear.” YAY! Whew!
Thank you to everyone for your wonderful support, and kind words.
Blaze fans ROCK!
I won’t be home to reply to your comments until this afternoon because today my youngest daughter is having an MRI on her brain.
First, let me explain why. About 3 years ago, my daughter started telling me and my husband that her right ear “felt funny”. I told her it was probably just stopped up and it would “pop” open on it’s own in a few days. But every evening, my daughter kept complaining, finally saying she couldn’t hear out of that ear. Well, it was always right before bedtime and, like most young children, she’s always been a big staller about going to sleep. Plus, she’d never had any ear infections—I mean, none. It’s my one bragging right as a mother. None of my children ever had ear infections–so I really didn’t give it much thought.
Then, a few weeks later we were in the movie theater and I whispered something in her right ear since I was sitting to her right, and she turned her head so I would talk into her left ear. She did this several times until I asked what she was doing and she said, “I told you I can’t hear out of my right ear!”
This was not bedtime. This was not when I was trying to get her to do her chores, or to turn down the television. I finally realized she might be telling the truth. So, I tested her. I whispered “I hate you.” into her right ear, knowing she would react to something so awful.
No reaction.
I blinked. Damn.
We took her to an ear, nose and throat specialist and they tested her hearing. 100% deaf in her right ear. My beautiful baby girl. My special gift after trying for two years and hoping for a girl. How she loved to sing. What a talker she was. What a huge vocabulary she had. How would all our lives change having a deaf child? I’d need to learn sign language. What would we do about school? And not only that, but…I was the Worst Mother in the World! What if I’d believed her 2 months ago? Could they have saved her hearing? What kind of monster was I?
The doctor said she had Otosclerosis — the immobilization, or hardening, of the stapes bone — occurs slowly. And is usually caused by a lifetime of exposure to loud noise, like a military person exposed to bombs and guns or someone who attended lots of loud concerts all their life. They said when she turned 18, our daughter can have a Stapedectomy to replace the bone with a prosthesis. What a special gift medical advances are that they can diagnose and correct so many human frailties!
That was 3 years ago, and every six months, we take her back to check the hearing in her left ear. Luckily, my worst fear has never been realized and she remains 100% hearing in her left ear. But this last checkup, our usual doctor was on vacation and the new doctor wondered again, why? This condition is very rare in someone so young. (At the time, she was only 8 years old) Had she had an infection? Not that I or my husband knew of. Was it hereditary? Again, not that either of us knew. So, the new doc ordered an MRI. Kind of late if the problem is a brain tumor, but okay. I felt, again, like the world’s worst mother. I should have insisted on something like this in the beginning! Why didn’t I make them do this three years ago?
Like most of you, I’d heard of MRIs (Hey, I watch House) but I’ve never had one. So, the first thing I did after being told my daughter needed one was to go to the internet and Google it. MRI stands for magnetic resonance imaging and is a medical imaging technique used in radiology to visualize detailed internal structures. Ok.
But what’s actually going to happen? My daughter wanted to know and was kind of scared, and I don’t blame her. So, back to the internet we went and I brought up some pictures of the machine so my daughter could see what it would be like. She’ll have to lie completely still for about 45 minutes.
My daughter was diagnosed ADHD last year. “Still” is not a word in her huge vocabulary. And to be in there all alone where I can’t hold her and comfort her? That’s going to be difficult for all of us. To tell you the truth, I’m a little nervous, myself. Nervous about the results. I can only pray everything is all right.
If you pray, please say one for my daughter today. If not, maybe send out some positive vibes into the world for me, will you? That would be an special gift to us this holiday season. I can deal with deafness, but I can’t deal with losing my baby girl. She was a special gift to us. We were pretty old when she was born (I was 38 and hubby was 47)
This was our year to host Christmas Day and my mom, and all my sisters and their husbands and my nephews came to our house for Christmas lunch and unwrapping presents. I get out my grandmother’s good Dresden china for the meal, and then it takes several hours to unwrap presents because we like to go two at a time so we can all see everyone open their gifts. At the end of the day, the living room was piled with discarded wrapping paper and boxes, and the house is a mess. But it’s worth it to make such special memories with the whole family. And that of course is my true gift. I’ve had so many special gifts in my life. A magical childhood. A loving family. A caring husband who is always there for me. My beautiful children. And so many friends and people who care about me. I’ve been pretty lucky. How can I ask for more? But I’m going to. I pray the MRI shows everything is okay.
I’ll post the results here, dear friends.

We here at the Blaze blog have been talking about our pets. Not necessarily on the blog itself (I’m writing this in advance of the holidays, so I don’t know what other people have done) but certainly behind the scenes. And given that we are smack dab in the middle of the holidays, I’d like to talk about the gifts my cats have given me.

I have two cats, both adopted from the local humane society. One is a lovable, loud, purring mass of male cat called Bandit. Here is a picture of Bandit in his usual habitat. Yes, he’s asleep on my chair taking up all of the chair. His other natural habitat is sitting in front of his food bowl crying for more food. Just because he ate ten minutes ago doesn’t change the fact that he’s hungry now.

What gifts do I typically receive from him? Well, mostly laughs. He’s not the brightest feline on the planet. When my other cat is chasing things, he’s usually about ten minutes behind. Yes, a full ten minutes. He’s the one looking for the mouse underneath the couch when the creature has run past him and into the kitchen and is now lurking behind the refrigerator. But he’s adorable in his stupidity…er, less than brilliance. And his purr never fails to cheer me up.

My other cat is Tali. She’s my huntress. She’s fast, smart, and has a talent for bringing me gifts of another sort. Here’s a picture of her (on my desk) with her most benign kill. That’s a Kathy Lyons keychain lion at her feet there. It has been appropriately killed and gifted to me. Other presents have included all manner of rodent and bird, both living and dead. The most Bandit ever killed was a full box of Q-tips. But he was quite proud of himself. He walked around with one hanging out of his lips like a cigarette.

Suffice it to say that I adore my cats, no matter what they give me. I have been known to tell my husband to be careful because he might disturb the cats when he climbs into our bed. I should note that they’re usually sleeping on his pillow when I say this.

So what presents have your pets brought you this holiday? Hopefully it’s an abundance of love and affection. But there are other joyful things that they bring too. Tell me, tell me! (Or confess that you’re pet free but think my cats are adorable). One lucky commentor will receive a free Kathy Lyons book like Taking Care of Business, my November release.

Sometimes, in the midst of work, life, family, obligations, and the rest, we need to do something special that gives us a boost, but it’s often harder for us to give gifts to ourselves than to others. Like opening a nice bottle of wine, going for a massage or a manicure, having a long bath with candles lit and a good book, or buying something that we would not ordinarily buy for ourselves.

A little self-indulgence now and then is good for the soul, I say. In my case, it came in an unexpected form this fall, when I received a store coupon for a Coach bag in the mail. I was going to give it to a family member to use, but as I looked for a winter bag and couldn’t find one, that coupon became very tempting. I thought, what if I used it for myself? Normally, I never even bother going into the Coach store, except to browse and think “why would anyone spend that much on a bag?”

Well, now I know. I decided I wanted to find THE bag. A bag good for the grocery store but nice enough to go out to dinner. Jeans or dress clothes. All seasons. It had to be perfect.

I found it. It took me three hours of walking around the mall to talk myself into using that coupon and buying it, but I did. As you can see, it’s a rather understated, classic bag, but I love the black leather and the silver hardware, the grommets, buckles and the adjustable strap. The leather is like satin — just touching it is a joy. I understand the difference now in the construction of a high-quality bag — the zipper opens and closes completely without effort, the strap is comfortable, the pockets are just right. I love every single little detail.

Even buying it was a treat. The sales people fall all over you, of course, and I love the little touches, like your receipt being all folded up nicely and put in a pretty little cardboard holder. It comes with a silky storage bag that it will likely never see. I am happy every time I look at it, take it somewhere, and get to coo over it with a friend. I have not had one second of buyer’s regret. In fact, I may be spoiled for life. My husband, bless him, didn’t even blink, never asked how much it cost. I showed it to him, and he admired the style and the liked the silver hardware, and then went back to what he was doing. Many, many reasons why I love this man.

So. . .that was my indulgence this fall, and I think it will be one that gives me a boost daily for a long time. What big or little things have you done for yourself lately? And if nothing, what would you like to do? The holidays, while fun, can be stressful, and a little self-indulgence is called for, I say. On that theme, maybe I can help you along a little. If you post here, I will pick a winner on Monday morning to receive the basket pictured to the left (the wonderful Joanne Rock and I put it together for you — full of bath items, books, and chocolate!). (Unfortunately, due to increased postage rates, I have to make this a US only giveaway, sorry.)

December 27th. It’s kind of a limbo day between Christmas and New Year’s Day. Nothing really special about this day. The excitement of the holiday, the parties, the gift giving is over, and on top of that, some of us may even have to go back to work tomorrow. Or worse, some of us may be working retail today and patiently helping all the people who are out returning everything they received and didn’t like. Ugh. A job I used to have and respect greatly. If I know my critique partner–and I do–she’s already got her Christmas decorations down.
When I was a child the days between Christmas and New Years were magical. No school. All the new toys to play with. Baked goodies my mom only made at that time of year, and the best thing: playing the new board game with my mom, dad, and sisters.
Every year we’d get a new game, and we’d play it for the next week. Anyone else remember a game called Masterpiece?
Or how about Mille Bornes?
And who didn’t play Life?
Ahhh, my childhood. Those were the days…

Now days when asked my favorite holiday, I half-jokingly answer; Labor Day. It’s the only holiday I don’t have buy, wrap, bake, cook, or cater to someone else. I still love Christmastime, but as an adult, I have a lot more work and a lot less time to play during the Christmas break.
And yet, there’s still something special about Christmas. I still believe in Santa Claus, and in the magic of this season. Every year I feel the ghosts of Christmases Past—my grandmother, my grandfather, and my father–surrounding me with their love, living in my heart.
I feel the excitement of Christmas Present, the anticipation of all my loved ones opening their gifts, eating a wonderful meal, and sharing the day.
And I can envision Christmases to come, when I might be dangling a beloved grandchild on my knee and watching with unspeakable joy as she experiences her very first Christmas.
Oh yes, I still believe in Magic.
After all, there’s nothing more magical than love.

I watched The Proposal this past weekend (really cute movie) and the heroine mentioned reading Wuthering Heights every Christmas. Do you read one special book every holiday? Are you looking forward to receiving a gift of books this year, or do you expect to be too busy to read (gasp!) this season? What books are you giving?

I tell family and friends never to buy me books — a gift card is fine, but I buy far too many of my own for anyone to know what I’ve read or haven’t, so books as gifts never work for me, but I do enjoy giving them. I try to make notes through the year of books I think family members will find interesting or fun, though sometimes I don’t wait. When my MIL visited this past September, I bought her the first four Karen Marie Moning Fever books because I was too anxious for her to read them to wait for Christmas. As for books we read every year, I don’t really have any particular book I return to over and over again. Last year, my husband had their Uncle’s enthusiastic reading, which he enjoyed, too. It’s nice for kids to have books as well as TV shows for their annual traditions, I think, even though I love many of the TV specials we grew up with.

I will be reading a lot through the month, working through my Kindle TBR and enjoying curling up in the evenings with some good reading. I am reading Charlaine Harris’s Grave Secret at the moment (not very Christmassy, I know, but it’s a good book), and have a list of romances (including some Blazes, of course) that I am looking forward to, as well. Are you reading any holiday-oriented romances you would recommend?

So what books are you reading, or do you want to curl up on a holiday evening and read this month? Share your current reading and I’ll pick two winners to receive a signed copy of my previous Christmas Blaze, Talking in Your Sleep, along with a tin of hot chocolate and a pretty mug. If you have this book already, just let me know if you would like it signed for someone else, and maybe it can be one of your gift items this season. Merry, Merry, and best wishes for a happy and peaceful month, whichever holiday you celebrate.

Sam