Turkey Day approaches.  The relatives are coming, so you do have to fix that panel on the oven door—the one that fell off in July. You have to fix the toilet in the guest bathroom, so that your mother-in-law doesn’t get an ocean of ick washing over her toes after flushing. And yes, you do need to replace the rug chewed up by the dog, before Uncle Ernie gets his Birkenstocks caught in the holes and goes down flailing.

The cobwebs must go, and the dings, gouges and black marks on the walls . . . because you want your dysfunctional family to think that you live in a magazine, right? I’m not sure why most of us get into this frenzy of preparation, but we do. And then everyone arrives to create chaos. 

Little Irwin spills grape juice on your couch. Susie drops her Barbie doll onto a hot burner on your stove, and shrieks to the heavens when her sequined-clad butt grafts to it permanently.  (Barbie’s, not Susie’s, thank God.) And to top it all off, your cousin, who talks with her hands, sweeps the pumpkin pie off the sideboard as she tells a story. Splat! Um, ice-cream, anyone?

The oven door may be fixed, but a hinge on a cabinet door will malfunction, leaving it hanging drunkenly just in time for pictures. The toilet may now flush, but the coffee pot will die. And the new rug looked a lot better without burnt-orange smears all over it.

Are you feeling thankful? I am.

I’m thankful that my dogs have already gotten mud all over the deck that I slaved for hours to paint last weekend. I am thankful that the outdoor cushions I scrubbed are already re-growing mold. I’m thankful that the new plants I put in the front beds are hanging out with the wrong crowd: weeds.

Murphy and his Law like to laugh at people before the holidays. What can you do?

Seriously? Be thankful. For your family, your home, the blessings you’ve been given, and for the opportunity to have people mess up your house! They’re there because they love you . . . and everyone knows that you don’t live in a magazine. Get real!

Wishing you the very best for the upcoming Thanksgiving holiday–chaos and all,

Karen Kendall

What is something UNEXPECTED this year for which you are thankful?

Usually, I’m thankful that SOMEONE ELSE is making the food that is so fabulously arrayed before me. Usually, I’m thankful for my family and friends, my recent contracts, my generally wonderful life. Yadda yadda. Okay, so I’m blessed. But this year, something incredibly weird happened.

I’m thankful that I AM able to try and cook something this year. Yes, for my vegetarian daughter I’m going to try and cook a vegetable pot pie. The recipe was in Vegetarian Times to which we subscribe. But…you see, I don’t cook. Well, maybe microwave popcorn, but that’s the extent of it. In fact, I’m becoming something of a raw-ist not because of principle or anything like that. But because I’m too lazy to do more than pull spinach leaves out of a bag. Add some pre-shredded cheese and I’ve got dinner.

So the fact that I’m motivated to try to cook something as elaborate as pot pie…well, that is a shocker indeed. And kudos to whatever urge struck me hard enough to get off my duff and try. So THANK YOU to the mysterious urge. I’ll let you know later if the experiment causes other people to thank me for NOT doing this again next year.

UPDATE: Vegetarian Pot Pie was edible. Barely. Was welcomed to make it again for next year, so long as I’m not hurt when no one eats it. But I tried, so I feel like it was win!